Breathe – it’s Spring

We’ve been quiet over here lately. Things have been a bit stressful, exciting, crazy… all those things. It’s just life.

I’m learning to breathe. Take moments to just sit still and breathe. The house is always a wreck, the laundry is never-ending, the kids stuff is all over the house… signs of a live well lived, I know. But too often I find myself focusing on these messes than the laughter, the fun and the unexpected surprises everyday. I’ve been feeling overwhelmed in this parenting game, I’ve been feeling underwhelmed in my work life, and I feel like I am still in a ‘stay at home mom’ fog. I am walking in a fog most days hitting repeat on mundane things like cooking, cleaning, playing, walks, school pick ups, school drop offs, meltdowns, solo parenting, slime everywhere and just navigating auditing.

Adulting is real. and it’s no fun!

The weather has finally warmed up and we’ve been spending ever single waking moment outdoors. Hiking, jumping in puddles, exploring and painting. Lily loves to sit outside and paint and now Thomas has taken up the hobby as well. Jonah just loves that Thomas is still for more than 5 minutes and enjoys watching him color.

We’ve been going on long hikes and bathing our mind, body and spirits in the forests of New York. The kids love looking for chipmunks and rabbits and finding strange-looking mushrooms growing on downed trees.

I’m trying to get back to a schedule that makes sense and have started running again. Spring… always a time for rebirth. So forgiving of our winter woes. I’m looking forward to the warmer climate and everything that’s blooming in the garden and our lives.

 

 

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First Day of Summer and Fairies and Flowers

Happy First Day of Summer!

The summer fairies are out and we’ve already spent a good chunk of the morning looking for them. Our yard is full of gorgeous dragon flies and you know fairies ride on dragon flies.

Summer is in full force over here. Thomas has been out of (pre)school for about a week and Lily is wrapping up her last week of 5th grade.

Last year at this time we were packing up to move and then spent 2 months in hotels  while we awaited the closing of our house.

The move has been great. The kids are happy, Lily has blossomed and we have seen that inquisitive amazing Lily that we had lost for a couple of years due to crappy ( and yes i say this with a straight face and finger pointed) school in Long Island.

I digress.

Summer in our new neighborhood has been great. The neighborhood kids have found our house to be the one with popsicles, soccer games, fire pits, snow cones a giant beast that kisses everyone and no shortage of imaginary fun.

Thomas has found his “fairy tree’. It sorta looks like the that tree from Game of Thrones right! He has been playing under the moss lined tree hoping to catch a fairy.

Of course Lily is too cool for fairies now… but she plays along really nicely.

Jonah has come face to face with deer, bunnies and who knows what else back in our woods. Did you now there are bears and coyotes roaming our neighborhood! So cool… scary but so cool!

Last week a neighbor put out a FB alert saying that someones lost husky was sleeping on her back deck… climbed up the stairs to sleep on the back deck right near the kitchen door. The dog was so huge she did now want to disturb it. She took a picture and posted it on the FB page and … it was a COYOTE! yikes!

I’ve planted flowers all over the yard in random places for a little pop of color here and there and then i forget to water them so my sad floral project is slowly dying Thank goodness for our awesome lawn guy who just shakes his head and tries to breathe some life back to my flowers.

Happy summer everyone… i’m thankful for these everyday blessing like flowers and fairies and summer time fun!

 

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In The Year 3

Our sweet little MOTO turned three last week and we celebrated with a great big Lightning McQueen themed party. His little best friends were around to spend the day with us and Thomas loved every minute of his birthday weekend.

I’m not one for big sappy sweeping essays but gosh I wish could conjure up something sappy right now because i am just so sad he’s getting older. Even Lily… she will be 11 on her next birthday … how do these days fly by?

He loves the color pink and baking cupcakes at 6am… which by the way is his wake up call everyday… and there are only so many thing you can do at 6am!

He doesn’t like to go to bed and loves baths. These days he has figured out how to open the heavy wooden front door and even tried to lock me out of the house. so that’s that.

Jonah and Thomas are the best of friends and one is never too far from the other… up to no good.
  

“ it’s been three years since you came out of mommy’s belly Thomas” Lily was just as excited as the rest of us to celebrate our little MOTO birthday last week. I’ll say it… it sounds cliché… but here it is… time goes by really really fast. These years are so quick and we have just barreled through them in the blink of an eye.   

Thomas you are named after your great-grandmother and your grandfather and your father and the generations of family members who have carried your name through the ages. You are brave, you are loving, you are strong, you are kind, you are creative, you are a wrecking machine and you are a leader. 

  
He was snuggled up next to me on the couch and

I said –  “Thomas you are a big boy now.”

To which he defiantly replied – “no I’m your baby.”

“you will always be my sweet baby Thomas” – I kissed him – “even when you are an old grandpa”.

“I’ll be a baby grandpa” – he said

“yep“

“and even when I have babies i’ll be your baby” 

“yep” I offered

“ I’ll be a baby daddy?”.

Happy Happy Birthday my sweet little boy. You are a fierce force in this world and the most gentle of spirits.

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daily dailies…

Matts been out of town for pretty much the entire month of November. He gets back to us tomorrow and I am just thrilled to have another adult in this house!

Thomas is going to be three years old in a few days. Anyone with a 2.5/3 year old will tell you that this age is nothing short of madness. It pretty much like dealing with a drunk mentaly unstable madman… all day!

Things get thrown across the room at any given moment, he pitches fits, he kisses me, he is a love bug AND a bit-ey little dragon all at the same time. You never know who you are going to get at any given moment.

Lily, amazing, moody, hormonal, space cadet, artsy and all art supplies are all over the house, moody, all of the above!

It’s tough being alone with the kids. it doesn’t help that the winter sunset clocks in at 4:58pm and it’s darkness after.

We also have a bobcat in the back yard. these woodpeckers are STILL pecking at the wooden shingles on the house and no one sleeps in this house.

Also Thomas is in the middle of potty training madness. So at any given moment…a ” Mom i made a potty” is announced with me running to the potty and there isn’t any poop in the potty but on the floor because we didn’t quite make it.

you guys… i’m going to lose me mind! I want to just run away the second Matt lands but he’s going to be jet lagged and I have missed having him around so I won’t run away.

Sometimes It’s just a lot!

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Weekly Promises

Weekly Promises I make weekly promises to myself to help me fine tune and navigate this life of mine. There is so much that I want to do and sometimes it can all seem overwhelming if looked at in one great big “thought cloud”. So I break down my wants and wishes and hopes to quick 5 day routines. This way I can add more good habits each week while keeping the ones from the week before. I call them – Weekly Promises. The start of a week is a great ‘refresh’ button and I for one love a good clean slate! Looking at the bigger picture, I sometimes feel so very isolated in my own space, keeping this family train on its tracks and just making sure we are all functioning as we should. Forgetting the bigger, greater world around us. These weekly promises are helping me think and act and react to my living space and those around me while also being mindful of the moments in immediate time.

This week I’ve promised to:

  • Cook root vegetables : It’s the fall season and some roasted turnips, squash, carrots sounds delish!
  • Overlook small things. I am super guilty of letting small things get to me. This week I wont complain about the empty toilet paper roll, the towel thrown in the middle of the hallway, the dishes in the sink.
  • Be kind. I tell lily all the time… you don’t have to be nice… but you always have to be kind. This was especially hard when she was being bullied in school. But us adults need reminders to be kind everyday. To grocery store employee checking you out, to the neighbor who complains about your leaf pile, or even just your family. Be kind.
  • Call a friend. In this era of texting and FB being the official form of communication a phone call is valuable beyond measure and a snail mail note… that’s just awesome!
  • Patience. This is a really tough one for me. I have a short patience fuse and this fuse always goes off with my family. So patience… breathe, relax, slow down, patience.
  • Being Mindful – how many times are we rocking the baby to sleep while checking email on the phone or trying to chat with the kids while finishing up just one more email. I am very guilty of all this. In order to help me be mindful, i have to be prepared and plan ahead. Waking up early to catch up on work or emails or whatever moment I need before the day begins is the key to living in a mindful space.
  • Go to bed before 1am. This is tough one since I usually have a really long list of stuff to accomplish after the kids go to bed. Also this promise is on my list every week!

That’s it. Small steps that add up to big changes. Some of these are ongoing because they just don’t make a fix-all for patience.

Do you make weekly promises to yourself? Whats on your weekly list?

 

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daily…

The New York MOm

The New York Mom

We are STILL in a hotel and counting down the days until August 31.

 

I had this whole post written about how stressed I am and how … get this… even though our hotel room is bigger than most NYC apartments.. it’s still JUST NOT ENOUGH! so silly right! Stop complaining me thinks!

and then i checked my FB stream. Good ole crackbook… putting things into perspective… sometimes.

and I came across the Humans Of New York feed.

If you are not following this AMAZING movement….i’ll call Brandon and his photos and stories a movement…because he’s creating SUCH change in the world.

You should FOLLOW this now.

Humans Of New York has been in Pakistan for the past few weeks and he’s been profiling people all over the country. The stories are heartbreaking, beautiful and painful. These people are facing difficulties I can NEVER imagine.

but

i grew up in India and I have first hand seen these struggles in that country. It’s real.

and here I am… complaining about having the luxury of a luxurious hotel room, fancy dinners, playdates, and every luxury for my kids while we await the closing of a gorgeous home in a very coveted suburb of NYC.

Sheesh.

I am thankful for my blessings.

But please follow HUMANS OF NEW YORK. It’s my daily dose of humility, life, love, prayer and all of it!

 

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Cherry Blossoms in New York City

 

Hey you know what’s great about New York City in the springtime… the cherry blossoms. You can’t escape them. You can’t escape the cherry blossoms and you can’t escape dancing underneath them and you can’t just loving every moment of springtime in New York. The cherry blossom in Central Park in New York City are nothing short of natures miracle!

Last weekend we met some of our sweetest friends in Central Park and picnicked and danced and laughed and just welcomed this warmer weather.

After the dreary winter we all just went through, a few days of sunshine and happiness is the perfect thing to get you out and about with your sweetest friends.

Central Park is just bursting with the pinks of the Cherry Blossoms and the greens of the freshly mowed grass.

Spring \\  as if  the earth opens up to fill us with the gifts she’s been harvesting while the surface is frozen and glistening \\ Spring.

There is nothing quite like the first gorgeous spring day of the season and we spent it outdoors every single day over the weekend!

Thomas and I wandered around central park this afternoon and if you plan on heading out there, you might just catch the last of springtime blooms this week… i hope you grab a moment to wander through the park to soak in this beautiful season.

with friends!

 

Yay for Sppprrring!

 

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International Womens Day

International Womens Day

Today is International Women’s Day. I’m so fortunate to be raised by 2 amazing, powerful, strong-willed, stubborn and loving women. My mother and grandmother have been my force growing up, and now as a mother of two, I look to them more than ever for help, support and inspiration. My mom was a single mom raising 3 kids. I complain when Matt is away for 2 days and I have to juggle my part-time work, minimal house upkeep and microwaved meals. It wasn’t until I became a mother myself that I realized the immense sacrifice my own mom made for all 3 of us.

While today is about celebrating women who have made significant public contributions to history, science, women’s rights and other such causes. I would like to celebrate my mother and grandmother who made significant sacrifices to raise strong, kind, loving, stubborn and change makers for this world to benefit from!

I hope I can pass down, to Lily, a fraction of what was given to me by these two amazing women in my life.

 

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// T O D A Y //

We all rushed out  the door this morning at 8:15AM. Matt drops me off at the train station and then takes Lily to school and then comes back for the babysitter to come over for the day. A typical Thursday morning around here.

This morning, there was very heavy traffic on our street… bumper to bumper. This is out of the norm because we live in a residential area and there aren’t many cars driving through. Our neighbor who was also running out the door said – I think there was an accident and the traffic is being redirected.  

I mumbled something about how inconvenient this was and how dare someone gets into an accident near my home and mildly disrupt my routine.

The day went on like any other until Matt called me at work to tell me…

The accident this morning. A driver hit a 7th grader on his way to school. crossing the street. he ran a red light or made an illegal turn.

This stopped me in my tracks.

He continued …

The 7th grader has a sibling in the 2nd grade who attends Lily’s school.

Devasted.

How can this be? This was a cold sunny morning after 3 days of snowy ice-cold nor’easter rain. It was a beautiful day of possibilities. A celebration of winter. We are in the middle of the christmas season. How could this happen today!

…and I complained about the mild interruption.

As the day went on. This news has come to me in many ways. The news, the PTA meeting…

I cannot imagine losing a child in the most innocent of ways. Crossing the street that he does… every single day to go to school…every single day. Or what if this was a rare circumstance of him walking to school alone?

This is the same intersection that I cross with my kids every day during the summer months as we make our way to the town pool or head to our town park to ride our bikes or go for a jog with Thomas. Our babysitter crosses this intersection with Thomas as she takes him to the park to see the ducks and run around.

How could this happen. How could this happen so close to us.

My heart is broken. The family had to tell the sibling about this. What awful news to deliver. How does one even do that.

I came home from work today and Lily rode up on her skateboard to give me a huge hug and start with the stories of the day. Thomas was at the door jumping around at the mere sight of me, demanding every ounce of my attention. The Christmas tree was lit, the sun was setting and I walked into my warm cozy home. This winter day. With my entire family around me.

Count your blessings.

This life you guys… it’s here but for a moment.

Live your fullest in these moments.

– Please say a quick prayer of peace for this family who is dealing with an unbelievably heavy loss.-

 

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T W O

New York Mom

New York Mom

New York MomMy sweet little Thomas turned two today. His life is so full of newness every single day. He has helped me slow my life down and really appreciate the smallest of gestures.

Lily said, ” I’m so glad he’s the one who came out”.

Today when I picked him up, he took my face in his little hands, squeezed and said – i love you mama. His I love you was so pure and awesome I almost forgot what I was doing and where I was.

You know when kids are little they say things which are so honest and awesome that it totally shakes you because of the pure newness and purity of the statement. I want to capture him and his love for everything, his sense of wonder and exploring. I want to freeze this age and hold it close forever.

I love you sweet Thomas. Happy Happy Birthday!  I am so blessed that YOU are the one who came out.  

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